When my word is difficult

Remember that word God chose for me to represent my entire year?

Oh yeah. Trust. That's the one.

I was thinking the other day about trust. We trust in a lot of things: God, our country, the bank, medicine. And then we trust other things: friends, parents, doctors. It's weird to say you trust in your mom. Although I guess it semi makes sense - it's still weird. So, at least for me, I trust in objects and I trust people.

Objects and people. Notice in which category my Lord was placed?

I often say I trust in God. But rarely do I say I trust God. And there's a difference. When I use that little two-letter word in between trust and God - it lets me off the hook. It means I trust in the idea of God and the idea that His way will prevail eventually, but it also means that I am not trusting Him with my day-to-day. I'm not giving Him everything. I'm letting Him take care of big picture things and I'll go ahead and take care of everything else.

Want to know why?

Because I'm scared. 

I'm scared that once I trust God instead of just trusting in God I'll lose control. I'm scared that once I trust Him with my day-to-day, He'll make my day-to-day something I can't handle. I'm scared that if I give Him everything He'll make me give up everything. I'm scared scared scared.

That's why my word is difficult today. Because change has come and is still coming my way. And I'll let you in on a secret:

I don't want to trust God. 

Tonight I am like Moses in the desert striking the rock. I am like Gideon asking for sign after sign. I am like Sarai giving Abram my servant. I am like Peter denying my Lord.

But Moses saw Canaan. 300 men defeated thousands. Sarah conceived. And the rooster crowed.

I may be scared - but I'm in good company. 

Life Goes On...

I bet you forgot what it was like for me to blog 

about something other than Spring Sing! 

But to prove it can be done...

Here is the classic Spring Break post:

It was absolutely everything a Spring Break should be.

It started off watching these two wonderful people tie the knot. 

Holly looked BEAUTIFUL and the wedding was wonderful. 

 Then I drove 15 hours with 15 girls to this...

Destin, Florida. 

 It. Was. Amazing. 

I laid on the beach every day.

I read two books for fun.

And I slept a lot.

 It was just what this Spring-Sing-worn-out body needed. 

So now it's back to school. And papers. And tests. 

And stressful situations. 

Lots and lots of change is happening in life - most of it incredibly wonderful. I'm sure I'll be blogging about it soon.

For now, I'll let you in on a little part of the change. 

I'm moving into a house! 

No more apartment life for me, which will be so strange.

But.

I can't wait to live with this girl:

We're growing up! 

Spring Sing 2011

Did Spring Sing happen almost 3 weeks ago?

Yes.

Did I "forget" to blog about it because I was recovering?

Yes.

Did I take a minimal amount of pictures because I was super stressed that week?

Yes.

Am I glad it's over?

Yes.

Am I so glad I did it in the first place?

Absolutely.

SSSP #27

Tomorrow marks the beginning of the end: Final(ly) Approval.

Monday was my last Executive and last Director meeting.

And, apparently, it came with PRESENTS! 

An adorable monogrammed cup from one of the faculty advisors: Amanda. 

And my favorite Sonic drink from Lambda!

The last director meeting involved lots of speeches, a board diagram, and one or two rounds of applause.

They like me, they really like me!

Now it's time for it all!!!!

I can't wait.

SSSP #26

There is a high likelihood I will either lose my sanity or commit heinous crimes within the next two weeks.
You have been warned.
It's been nice knowing you all.

SSSP #25

These are actually from yesterday.

A wonderful (mostly) free day spent with my sister.

But also spent cutting and cutting and cutting and cutting.

Above - the before.

 Below - the after.

At least I'll be organized for show week, right?

And the entire time, my sister did this:

Literally all day.

What's a girl without cable to do?

SSSP #24

I had written out an entire post just 2 minutes ago.
All about my day of Spring Sing.
I even previewed it.
It was short, witty, informative - and completely negative.
So I deleted it.

It has just been one of those days.
But I serve a God who is God of the bad days, too.
And even though I feel miniscule tonight - I know He is upholding me with His righteous right hand.
And that is what I want to remember about Spring Sing today.